A River Runs Through It

I’m looking at my CGM aka Bowie, and seeing a good number for a change of pace.  In the area I like it to be.  It’s difficult to attain that perfection in both the blood sugar zone and A1c that seems to plague many of us with diabetes.  It’s not easy, with dealing with other aspects of life that make things go up and down, just like a roller coaster ride.

Since having the surgery last September that resulted in having one of my ovaries removed due to it acting funky wonky, along with removal of fibroids that I knew would eventually shrink down due to menopause without under ongoing surgery … well … that pretty well upset the balance of my body.

Meanwhile, I was still playing around with sorting out the earlier diagnosis in 2014 with a sluggish thyroid aka Hashimoto.  This is something that seems to plague many diabetics since it’s another autoimmune condition.  I thought at that time, I would be put into a looney bin with how that affected my mental health … and along comes menopause!

I just did a months trial to help with the hot flashes that made knowing whether I’m having a low blood sugar or not abit easier.  I can’t say enough about EstroGel (see note below)!   After a few weeks, I was actually experiencing normal sleep, not waking up with a river running through my girls.  Because it feels the same as having a low blood sugar being all clammy, my body has been trained over the past ½ century of having diabetes to wake up and save itself from going too low. 

That’s where the CGM has been helpful, in alarming when it is an actual low, provided that the sensor is behaving (it’s pretty accurate most of the time with lows, not so much when in the higher areas – which luckily isn’t too often).  Still, it’s hard to break out of the habit of waking up, it’s been built into me, but having 1 full week of no waking up was like the best holiday I’ve had in awhile, and I didn’t go to any exotic location except home sweet home.  People who know the value of a good sleep will be nodding in agreement, it makes or breaks you, and as a diabetic, it also effects how your blood sugar readings will be.

It’s a wicked circle – sleep – hormones – everyday life – sometimes taking care of diabetes can be overwhelming.

Sadly, I’m no longer on the EstroGel due to my gyno being abit concerned with the breast cancer aspect of being on hormone replacement therapy (HRT).  I’ve knew the possible side affects of heart attacks, strokes, or blood clots with using the gel, but didn’t realise the cancer bit.  Because of having had diabetic mastopathy, where my breast in the end had to be removed due to unawareness of the condition at the time, he felt that being on hormones might aggravate the condition in the other.  

So, in order to help with the hot flashes, he’s put me on a month’s trial of a low dose antidepressant (I didn’t know this at the time, until getting home and having a mind seizure reading what the drug was supposed to be for since I’m not depressed).  It’s called Paroxetine, and I’ve been given the lowest dose possible of 10 mg which is supposed to help with the serotonin level of your sponge brain, and help with elevating hot flashes and improving sleep.  It takes about a month to take full affect, and I’m only into my 2^nd week.   And so far, the side effects of the drug which scared the bleep out of me, aren’t happening.   There are other similar drugs out there that the pharmacist I spoke to after I flipped out said were more common, but I’m going with what my gyno has recommended that I try out in the meantime.

UPDATE:  Since starting this blog (and exploring some of the aspects of the EstroGel ) I’m realizing that maybe it’s better to stay off of it.  Reports of gaining weight (which I have seen with an increase in my stomach and legs, despite it making for better real estate for injections) along with possible mucking up thyroid, hmmm.  I think the anti-depressant is the better option to be on as long as it works.  So, the original plan that my gyno and I were doing together with investigating how the HRT affects diabetes mastopathy is not going to be an issue that I’m going to look any further into. 

The story of my Dolly Partons as I fondly like to call them

Due to some teething problems at Diabetes1.org - where I still try to blog and post in forums from time to time - I'm slowly moving some of my "better" blogs (hey - they're all works of art to me <lol>) to Blogger - to ensure that we/I can still read them (a lot of research/work goes into my blogs I type out).  This one - about diabetic mastopathy is often one that is asked about when I talk about my Dolly Partons - aka silicone implant that even today - still feels a bit weird - but I've grow \ to love it.   Please note, there are some good comments at the original blog at this link (hopefully it will work for you, I have good days, bad days at the site).  

Read on - and hopefully my words make sense - if not - don't be shy - ask - or maybe share your own experiences with diabetes mastopathy - you're not alone.  

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Back in my early 30's I experienced some problems with my left breast - and of course - the first reaction was "breast cancer".   I was immediately seen by a breast surgeon to determine why my breast tissue was sinking in - along with the lumps (like many women - I have very dense breast tissue).  Needle biopsies were useless due to the hardness of the lump - so over the next 5 years - I underwent many slice ‘n dice procedures as more growths appeared - drainage tubing - core biopsies, yadda, yadda, yadda.   I was a medical oddity - making medical journalist documents to the point where I was willing to go to a Miami medical conference and stand naked up on the stage for someone to say - " Ah ha - we know what it is !!! ").

In the end, because I am a gal who likes to be informed about my health - I hit the needle in the haystack - and came across a few articles on a condition known as diabetic mastopathy .  Yes, I the patient figured it out, but the sad thing is, in every article I came across - they said to " leave the lump alone it'll resolve itself after menopause and do not operate as this can lead to more growths! ".  When I told my surgeon what I had discovered - he was very baffled by it all - and I became abit of a celebrity in the medical community due to the way my healthy breast tissue had been eaten away to basically the point of nothing.  I wore silicone prosthesis for many years - which became abit of a party hit - when I'd take it out of my bra - and slam it on someone's forehead - sort of like the neural parasite from the Star Trek episode of Operation Annihilate.

So, advance many years later - about 4 years ago - what has become of the breast at that time is now a  lump - like a piece of wood  - hard - uncomfortable - sometimes painful when my cat would walk across my chest at night time to cuddle.  The recourse at this point in time - due to now a new group of surgeons wanting to slice ‘n dice me - is because of not knowing if this could become cancer over time - and they had nothing to compare me to - was to go ahead with a subcutaneous mastectomy (removal of the breast tissue inside - leave skin intact on outside).  Three days recovery in a hospital (have I ever told you I hate hospitals?) - I was CURED - thump with the bible on my forehead!!!

I'm still getting used to having a "Dolly Parton" again - have abit of scarring problems due to all the surgeries (had to have implant removed and replaced due to wrong size few years ago) - but I'm doing alright.  Because many mastectomy survivors have to keep there arms immobile for awhile - I did develop frozen shoulder -  not annoying enough to cause movement problem - but needs abit of work.  Of course, we diabetics are known for this condition - what isn't with long term diabetes ?  So, I've got a physiotherapist coming by my house for the next little while - showing me the correct techniques to massage the breast due to the scarring and tightening of muscles (very strange - when you have no feelings) - as well as sorting out the frozen shoulder.  The funny thing about the physiotherpapist who works with many breast cancer survivors - has never heard of this condition of the breast - and she knew very little about diabetes - so I educated her about diabetes while she did her magic work on me.  So, one more person out there that now knows that diabetes is a serious disease despite what they see of us on the outside (I told her that diabetics blood sugar when high is like battery acid on an engine - eats away at the good stuff - abit scary to hear - but it's true when you think about it).

So, look out world - I'll soon be back to slinging over the shoulder boulders at you - as I take on the world with my Dolly Partons!!!  Just remember - diabetic or not - always do your monthly self breast examinations - and get a mammogram done at least every 2 years - or as recommended by your medical team that helps with your mission of good health!

Note - This blog was originally posted on August 19th, 2009 at Diabetes1.org - they own my work that I've written over the years for them.

UPDATE - Check out Ann Bartlett's article at Health Central on Living with and Managing Diabetic Mastopathy posted March 09, 2015